Fibromyalgia is...
| Oct 15, 99 | Feb 6, 99 | Apr 28, 99 | July 20, 99 | Aug 29, 99 | Sept 11, 99 | Feb 15, 00 | Sept 17, 00 |
| Feb 19, 01 | Jan 15, 02 | Feb 27, 03 |
Oct. 15, 1998 Last week I had gotten very bad and was having trouble
just getting through a day. I could not hardly function. I went
back to my neurologist and told him the terrible time I was having just functioning.
Come to find out I was having a bad reaction to one of the meds he had put
me on. He changed all my meds and I am feeling better this week.
The pain and the weakness is still here but I am feeling better and was able
to get through my work week. Now I have some days off and hopefully
I can go hunting. Wish me luck :o) I want to thank all my friends for
the prayers and the support in this difficult time for me. I am still
reading and researching FMS and at this time starting the lifestyle changes
to make my life better. Giving up my coffee is the hardest thing of
all. I love my morning coffee.
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Feb. 6th, 1999 I have adjusted to knowing that I will
have to live with this the rest of my life
and I know that to feel better I have got to stick to the
lifestyle change also known as the The Fibromyalgia Diet
to feel better. That is no caffeine, no sweets, no junk food.
Drinking only water, herbal tea and decaf. coffee. Also excising moderately
building as I can. I slipped up at Christmas and now having a terrible
time getting back to where I was. I know that with the meds and
a lifestyle change I do much better. Also
Magnesium
/Ester C helps me a great deal. So if I can help you get through
each day just by being a friend then email me
SusieQ. Living with FMS is not easy but you can make it. With support from one another and knowing that with the right things for you then you can have some good days. I know there is no cure and the painful days are hell but just hang on and get past that day, that hour, that minute. There have been days when I have had to get past the moment. Sometimes you are going to have high pain and low tolerance. On those days, remember your friends and that they are pulling and praying for you. {{{hugs}}} Sue
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April 28, 1999 I am finally past all the weather changes that we were having during the spring. I was having a very hard time with the barometer going up and down. Like arthritis patients we know when a weather change is coming but it affects our fibro muscles instead of our joints, the reason it is part of the name. We have had thunderstorms since yesterday and it makes our days rough. Other than the storms, I am doing very well right now. I still get wiped out very easy but the pain has decreased greatly for now. I am enjoying the wonderful weather and getting caught up on a very long to-do list. So if you have recipes or pics to send to me then please do to
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July 20, 1999 Bowhunting season opens for us in South Carolina
in six weeks. I have been shooting my bow trying to get ready
for the upcoming season. I still have some problems shooting.
My arms give out so I can not shoot for any length of time. Sadly they
just will not cooperate like they did before FMS. I am hanging in there
and trying to live my life as normal to me as possible. I am going
to give bowhunting my best shot this year. I will be hunting with my
rifle also this year on those days I want to hunt but know my bow is too
much for me. I just missed out on too much of the hunting season last
year. I hope all of my bowhunting friends understand. I am here
for you if you need a friend, just
email me
. One thing I do want you to know is that although FMS changes
your life you can make it the best that you can and get support from so many
resources to help you get through the dark days. I pray your
days will be pain free and you have many bright tomorrows.
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August 29, 1999 Our bowhunting season open Wednesday. My stand
is in place, I am ready, very excited. Wish me luck, I pray this will
be the year for my first deer with my bow. If you happen to think about
me this fall and winter, I would appreciate a whisper of a prayer. I
also have dark days when it is so hard to deal with pain day in and day out.
As fall approaches I can feel myself going down again. I am not sure
how my bowhunting is going to go but I am going to give it all I have within
me. How do you get through it? I hope and pray you have the support
you need. Another dear friend of mine just let me know her husband
left her. He could not deal with the FMS anymore. My heart aches
for her and everyone that has FMS. As always if I can help you
email me
.
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September 11, 1999 Bowhunting season opened and I hunted as much as possible.
In this area you could only shoot bucks regardless if it was bow or not.
One evening I was not going to go because I just did not feel like I could
walk in to my stand. Danny said come on and I will take you to your stand.
He took the 4-wheeler off the truck and drove me to my stand. He is
a great hubby and very supportive and so helpful with the problems we face
with FMS. By the way, I was using a climbing stand, it helps because I can
rest and take breaks when I am climbing the tree. I was not able to
get a shot but being out there watching the does, yearlin', squirrels, birds
just made it great. It was a very relaxing time for me, some days were
to hot to hunt so I left early. On the 15th bow season opens for us
in our county and we can get a buck or doe with a bow. I will be out
there as much as possible so wish me luck. There is nothing that I
would rather do that hunt and this year I will be hunting either with my
bow or my rifle as much as possible. Oh yeah, gun season opens on the
15th on the club land. Thank you all for your prayers, email and support
you continue to show me. I have been very blessed with some of the
best friends anyone could ask for from all over the world. {{{hugs}}}
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February 15, 2000 I can't believe I let all this time slip by without updating my journey. As you see we all made it through Y2K. I did not get anything with my bow but I did enjoy hunting as much as I could with it. By the end of October I have to put my bow down. Check out my birthday buck, 8 point 150 lbs harvested with my rifle . We did go on our bear hunting trip in New Brunswick in October at Harts Lake Lodge . I missed two bears (hunting with my bow) but the trip was just wonderful. If you get a chance to go then go. It is the chance of a lifetime. Check out SusieQ and Danny go bear hunting if you have not seen it. Rick and everyone at the lodge were just great, they were so helpful. Every morning Danny would wake me up for breakfast and I would take my meds and read for a while... Danny would wake me up again for lunch. (hehehe) We would start getting ready to go hunting after lunch. Paul would help me get to the stand and leave and come back later. I would have to stop and rest several times going in and out but I did make it. I just relaxed and rest while we were not hunting. I can't wait to go back.
On to Christmas, one thing I did learn was not eating healthy really kicks in your FMS. Our diet really does play a big role in how we feel (mine for sure). You know all the parties, get-togethers etc... how many had healthy foods? I did get through it and made my mind up that I had to eat healthy to survive. I started in January and just by eating healthy food I have lost 14 pounds. I have slipped up a few times and we know what happen right? I suffered... It is a struggle but to feel better I have to eat healthy. I have not had a coke since September '99. I love my coffee but did switch to decaf. (hehe). I have not gotten strong enough to give up the decaf. yet. If I get that strong urge for chocolate then I drink a cup of hot cocoa. At least it is not as bad as the rest of chocolate desserts. Choose that healthy food and you will see a difference in how you feel.
In January we moved and of course the FMS really kicked in. I would like to thank everyone that help us move, especially Crystal and Scottie. We had been in our new house for a week when Winter Storm 2000 hit and were without power for four days. Still feeling the affects of moving on top of the storm I just kinda crashed and rested. I was just not up to doing anything. We did have water so we just brought in our camping equipment and camped in the house. The snow was beautiful until it turned into ice. We could not leave our house without using 4-wheel drive and no one could get in.. One thing I learned for sure is that a 4-wheel is not any help on ice. I wrecked my Toyota 4-Runner, the damage was not bad. I was very sore for a few days. I can't tell you how much this southern gal was glad to see the snow/ice go away.
Sometime the pain really gets bad but generally it is that all over achy
flu feeling. We tend to overdo on our good days and our body
lets us know. I still am taking my meds and praying for strength to
get through each day. Having FMS is an everyday battle
and I am here if you need a friend
to help you get through each day. You can make it, just pray and
hold tight to get through that difficult moment, hour or day to pass.
We have heard it all of our lives, one day at a time. With FMS
I had to learn to live that way and you can too. {{{hugs}}}
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September 17, 2000 Here it is hunting season again. I went bowhunting four times so far. I have only got one shot and I missed. It has been a long time since I wrote anything on my journey. This has been my worst time in my life. From my last entry in February, most of the days are a blur.
My Dad was very sick in ICU for just about the whole month of April. We visited him Easter Sunday and had lunch in the hospital cafeteria. It was a great meal and we were all there (family). Then we went back to the waiting room till time to see him again. After a long stay in the hospital, my Dad did get better and went home and was so happy to be there. He was like a kid at Christmas. His flowers were blooming and everything seemed so right. Needless to say we lost my Dad and buried him the day before Mother's Day. I can not tell you the loss he left behind. Until you loose someone you loved that much you don't know how hard it is. I know I didn't. I can't imagine my heart ever healing. It feels like it is cracked wide open.
Basically I have just been getting through each day the best I can. I have been going through a full blown flare. I am having problems with my legs and some times just can barely walk. I am really having a hard time climbing into a tree stand. Danny my wonderful husband has been there to help me. I won't be able to hunt as much as I want but I will be out there. I don't like having to depend on anyone and I loved hunting alone but I can't anymore. Ladies you understand how it feels to be able hunt alone. I have to be thankful that I can still hunt. I am still here if you need a friend. Email me
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February 19, 2001 As I stated in September I did not get to hunt much. To read about our bear hunt click here . It was so hard on me. We drove this year... first mistake. We would get ahead of the front moving in and then it would catch up with us. The weather was awful up to Friday and I didn't hold out very well at all.
However I did get my
first deer with my bow on November 12, 2000. I didn't get to hunt after
that due to the weather and FMS. Loosing my Dad was so hard and the
stress along with not eating right... Of course we know what happen then,
spiraling down until you just can not go any longer. If you have
not had those days where you beg God to just come get you and take you
home then I assure you they will come. Now to January... I forced myself
to start eating right again and I am doing so much better. I don't
understand why I slip up when I know what it is going to do to my body.
I gave up tea this time too. The only way to feel as best as you can
with FMS is to eat healthy. I really don't follow any certain diet
but choosing healthy foods instead of junk. One thing I noticed also
was yogurt helps with my tummy. I have a new web site for women
hunters. Click here to check
it out
. Also I just updated the women
bowhunters web site so be sure to check it out also. The best advice I can give anyone with FMS is eat healthy and find others that understand. As always email me if you need a friend that understand.
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January 15, 2002 It has been almost a year and I have been out of work since August 2001. Danny and I were down on the club land working one Saturday before hunting season opened. It was hot but I didn't feel like I got too overly heated. I got very sick on my stomach that afternoon and stayed that way until Sunday morning. Later during the afternoon the top of my head felt like it was going to explode. The pain was pulsating like the beating of my heart. We tried everything we could to get it to stop. The only thing I could do was curl up, hold my head and pray. After hours of this and nothing working Danny took me to the hospital. They gave me shots to stop the pain and ran some test. They didn't find anything so they sent me home. They gave me a prescription and some pills in case I needed them.
Tuesday morning I woke
up with the same pulsating unbearable pain again. Terri my youngest
daughter called Crystal to come get me and take me to the my doctors office
to see his assistant. They admitted me to the hospital and ran test.
They could not find anything that started these
disabling migraines
but I would have to take preventive medication to keep them away. They
started me out on a low dosage of
Topamax
to build me up to a dosage that would keep the migraines away. Also I
keep Maxalt
with me just in case a migraine is able to get through... At the first
sign of a migraine I put one of the
Maxalt
on my tongue and let it dissolve. If it does not go away I can take another
one in two hours. So far the second one has gotten rid of any migraines
that seem to slip through. I do not go anywhere without my Maxalt. If you
suffer from migraines ask your doctor about Maxalt. I prefer the one that
melts on my tongue because it works faster and is more convenient no matter
where you are. You can also get the pill form but you need water to take
it and it takes longer to work.
I have been on so many different medications since August that I
just can not keep up with them all. The only ones that have stayed constant
are the Topamax, Syntroid, Prilosec and Ultram for pain. So many others
have came and gone...
I really did not hunt this year because I was just not up to it
physically. I did take my
granddaughter Alexis hunting and we got a doe
. That doe was the only deer I harvested this year. With
www.womenhunters.com
and BADF Disabled Services
we had our 1st
Annual All Women Disabled Hunt December 14 - 16 2001
. It was great being with the other ladies.
That pretty much brings us to Christmas and now... I have to admit that since August I have not felt like myself at all. I don't know if it is the drugs, FMS or what? I pray to get through each day. I have been very weary lately but I have had a lot of friends praying for me and I am feeling better. Thank you my friends for all the prayers. As always email me if you need a friend that understands or just need a friend...
{{{hugs}}}
There is no greater gift that a friend can give than to whisper
a prayer to the Father... in your behalf...
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February 27, 2003 I have gotten email from different people wanting to know how I am doing now and asking me to continue my journal so here it is. It has been over a year since my last update. The last year of my life has been very hard for me. Thankfully I am still here, believe me I have prayed for our Lord to come get me many times. I was even close to taking my own life but I got through that also with the help of my husband and a dear friend L. I am sure she know who I am talking about... The Lord really blessed me with her. She helps me in so many areas of my life. The doctors tell you that FMS doesn't get any worse but it does. When I was first told I had FMS the doctor told me he was going to make me as comfortable as possible. The one thing I have learned with FMS is that is impossible... I don't know how bad your pain level gets but mine gets pretty bad. I always think it can't get any worse than it does. It has proved me wrong time and time again. The medication doesn't take it away... when the weather is involved and there is a front moving in that makes the barometer go up or down. If it changes we feel it. This pain is so intense; it is like the pain is within and sometimes is a deep burning pain that just will not quit. I wish I was a writer and could describe it better. My legs are my worst problem and there are times that I can not stand for any length of time or walk. I am not able to endure the pain it takes to cook a family meal any longer. It's only quick stuff around here now. I don't drive any more due to not being able to focus on my driving. It is like I am the passenger when it comes to doing something or watching something on the side of the road... I know all of this is just ramblings but I am not sure how to tell you what is going on in my life right now. My memory has really gotten awful. My family gets frustrated with me asking them the same questions over and over. When I see that look then I know I have asked that question too many times even though I can't remember the answer. I use to have a brain... I really did... I graduated college with honors and wore the gold and everything... member of Phi Theta Kappa. I found my gold honor ? the other day in a drawer when I was looking for something else and I broke down and just cried and cried... why? it was evidence my friend. Once I did have a brain, not one like I have today that is all mush. So not only do you have the physical pain to deal with every day but the mental anguish also.
I went from a very independent woman that hunted alone to a person that is dependant upon a great deal. My work schedule allowed me more time to hunt than my husband. Now I don't hardly hunt at all. If I hunt one weekend it usually takes me three weeks to get over it. The exhaustion, the pain makes the effort very hard so I sit here at my computer and create WomenHunters for everyone else. With the help of everyone else on the staff/writers. You can check it out if you have not been there... WomenHunters. Also Angie has been another answer to prayer. I would not have been able to keep WomenHunters going for the past five months if it wasn't for her. She is my Assistant now and I feel very comfortable leaving it in her hands. With the pain from this year and I guess the depression from so much going on. Fighting to get my long term disability and loosing, filing for SSD, loosing one income is very hard. Trying to get through each day one day at a time... however it took me. I begged and begged our Lord to come and get me but he didn't seem to think it was time for me to go home. I have been taught all my life that we are able to withstand what ever is put upon us because our Lord would not put anything upon us that we could not bear. Having FMS is very hard to believe that. When I am on my couch crying out to God because I can't take the pain it is so hard to believe... dealing with pain day in and day out is the hardest thing in my life I have ever done. I know it is yours also. What can I say to you to help you get through it? What ever it takes... Hang in there! I know it is hard. Find someone to help you through it. A support group or someone that understands what you are going through. The support group at Rest Ministries is great. If you find yourself doing off the wall stuff that makes you feel just plain stupid... don't let it get to you cause it happens and there is nothing you can do about it. I guess that is what they call the Fibro Fog. What is so bad about it is I do it without realizing it and I would stake my life on it that I didn't do it. I just hope and pray that the Lord is watching over us while we are in the fog and in our stupid mode. LOL... might as well laugh. I bet some of the things you have done are funny. Some of the ones I have are. You know I am here if you want to talk...
There is one more thing that I want to tell you about and I am going to stop for this time... check out this article MYCOPLASMA: The Linking Pathogen in Neurosystemic Diseases what do you think about that? something huh??? oh yeah it is!!! Now please go here to this research web site and see what they say about mycoplasma. Chronic Fatigue Illnesses and then the Treatment Considerations. I have a friend that is already on the treatment and she is doing better. I am taking my doctor all the paperwork to ask him to start me on the treatment next week. I will try to do a better job at keeping my journal as I go on this treatment. I know it will make you sicker to begin with but if I will get better it will be worth it. Prayers? I can't ask for a better gift than a prayer. If you need a friend, a prayer just email me Sue Be sure to check out Immune Support also...
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April 13, 2003 I went to see my doctor and took him all the research papers. I just went back to see him again to find out if he would start me on the treatment. I couldn't convince him to try it. He said he is a tried and true doctor and that he is not willing to risk anything on me that is not proven. One thing he said has been proven and antibotics have worked with Rheumatoid Arthritis so he is treating me with antibotics and we will see how it goes. I have been on it for about a week now and I have really been having bad muscle spasms. I pray it will work... at least make it some better. as always email if you need a friend or a prayer... Sue
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April 17, 2004 I can not believe it has been over a year since I have written anything. I meant to keep up better than that. I guess all of you that have FMS understand. I really think the antibotic treatment has helped along with the low carb healthy diet. I could not tell any difference on the antibotics until I changed my diet again actually. I have not been able to tell any diffenence in the pain level. I still have pain and it still gets very severe at times. But overall I feel better than I did feel. I still can not sleep at night just like before and all of the same problems. I did get what I ask for... I do feel some better. The one thing I do notice is that I have to stick with the low carb and really watch what I eat. If I go back on the regular American diet... I go down hill very fast. I had a problem with kidney stones this year and got off of my diet and I could tell I was suffering worse. Now I am having a hard time getting back on my diet and sticking to it like I should even though I know I have too. As long as I stayed away from bread and sugar I did good but getting back on it has really messed me up. I am struggling now to get off of it (bread & sugar) again. Honestly it does make a difference! As always I am here if you need a friend... Sue
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April 23, 2005
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